and I could write a song a hundred miles long...
Right then, competition time kids.
Ever fancied yourself as a songwriter? Ever fancied sitting back in your mansion with your movie star wife as the royalties come rolling in? Of course you have. If Noel Gallagher can do it, how hard can it be?
Here is your challenge:
You may have noticed that all Coldplay songs are basically the same: there's a whole lot of wondering and questioning, things are broken and can't be fixed, puzzles are missing pieces... that kind of thing.
Your mission, should you choose to accept it, is to write your own Coldplay song.
As always, there is an excellent prize - the honour of picking the title for a post on this blog.
Here's my entry:
"Things Are a Bit Shit Now (But It'll Be Alright)"
I'd like to play with you-ooo-ooo
Monopoly or Clue-ooo-do
But I cannot get past Go (oh-oh)
And Professor Plum has gone
What's right has now gone wrong.
ooooooh, yeah
ooooooh, yeah
Things are a bit shit now
But it'll be alright
(it'll be alright)
....and so on.
Over to you, and feel free to take the piss as much as you like. For heaven's sake don't spend too long on it, or before you know where you are, you'll be all serious, wearing black and writing slogans on your hand.
----
Tomorrow, we draw a line under Glastonbury 2005 with Ben from Silent Words Speak Loudest giving us his Festival Earworms.
Coolio.
Ever fancied yourself as a songwriter? Ever fancied sitting back in your mansion with your movie star wife as the royalties come rolling in? Of course you have. If Noel Gallagher can do it, how hard can it be?
Here is your challenge:
You may have noticed that all Coldplay songs are basically the same: there's a whole lot of wondering and questioning, things are broken and can't be fixed, puzzles are missing pieces... that kind of thing.
Your mission, should you choose to accept it, is to write your own Coldplay song.
As always, there is an excellent prize - the honour of picking the title for a post on this blog.
Here's my entry:
"Things Are a Bit Shit Now (But It'll Be Alright)"
I'd like to play with you-ooo-ooo
Monopoly or Clue-ooo-do
But I cannot get past Go (oh-oh)
And Professor Plum has gone
What's right has now gone wrong.
ooooooh, yeah
ooooooh, yeah
Things are a bit shit now
But it'll be alright
(it'll be alright)
....and so on.
Over to you, and feel free to take the piss as much as you like. For heaven's sake don't spend too long on it, or before you know where you are, you'll be all serious, wearing black and writing slogans on your hand.
----
Tomorrow, we draw a line under Glastonbury 2005 with Ben from Silent Words Speak Loudest giving us his Festival Earworms.
Coolio.
posted by swisslet @ 20:39
17 Comments:
At 10:40 pm,
HistoryGeek said…
Being only slightly familiar with Coldplay, I don't know that my song will be appropriate, but I tried to stay within the parameters laid out...
A Time in Life
There's a time
in this life
when you just want to find
some peace from strife.
Chorus:
Time goes by.
Things all change.
Will we say good-bye,
or will we re-arrange?
There are times
in this world
when the oyster
holds no pearl.
Chorus
These times
are just like rhymes -
sometimes they suck,
but, what the fuck!
Chorus
____________________________
I'm sure I'll be famous.
At 10:54 pm,
Damo said…
"It's Christmas Time, there's no need to be afraid..."
I'll get me coat.
At 11:12 pm,
Flash said…
So you kicked your jigsaw off the table /
You want to laugh it off but you're unable/
The world feels like it's closing in/
Let my soft caring voice lift you from the bin
(Chorus)
Smile through your tears
face up to your fears
Work up through the gears
& open up your ears
If you cant shake the mood from your lonely cranium/
Come & have a singsong in a northern stadium/
The stars will sparkle in the skies above/
as 20000 hearts all share the love
(Chorus)
Will that do-ooooo?
Tell me will that do-oooo?
Does it sound hopefull yet blue-ooh?
Does it make you go: OO-OOOh?
*****************************
That concludes the entry from Flashland.
Nil points?
At 11:49 pm,
Mark said…
when what is wrong
can't be fixed
the question asked
is what this is?
what does it mean
to exist?
in the middle of life
comes an if
and I will try
all that i can
to live a life
be the best I can
to make trade fair
to make it all alright
its not a crime to care
in this life
when you are the missing piece
the jigsaw cannot be complete
cut through the commute
to find the truth
we all want a world a peace
and I will try
to save us
love is broken
but i dream
when i sleep
it could be real
hope my religion
you my ambition
we are one
invincible together
stronger than alone
we will conquer
this life
and I will try
all that i can
to live a life
be the best I can
to make trade fair
to make it all alright
its not a crime to care
in this life
At 11:51 pm,
Mark said…
and a burlesque extrapolation of Coldplay without any obvious piss takey words. btw.
At 9:10 am,
Teresa Bowman said…
You people are all forgetting to add the essential "Singing out ..." at the beginning of the odd line. And to lace each chorus with loads of "ooooooh-aaaaaahhh-yeaaaahhh", etc etc etc.
There are certain bands whose songs practically write themselves. I'm fairly sure all Idlewild songs contain the lyrics "Is it [something] or is it [something else]." And let us not forget dear old Brett Anderson and his incessant talk of dogs, lovers, streets, trash/litter/some other form of refuse ...
At 9:18 am,
swisslet said…
Ok Bee, but where's your entry then, eh?
At 9:42 am,
John McClure said…
Another quintessenial ingredient being neglected is the rhyming of words with themselves, e.g.:
"What if I got it wrong
And no poem or song
Could put right what I got wrong
And make me feel I belong?"
My entry will be along shortly, but I am chosing to neglect your advice not to spend too much time on it.
At 10:24 am,
LB said…
this is for all dads, including Gay Dad and "My Two Dads"...
Wires Run Somwehere Only We Know
We write the tunes like “Talk” and “Yellow”
That win a Brit, an Ivor Novello
The piano-led sound of “Don’t Panic” and “Trouble”
And we looked up at night to the stars and the Hubble
And then as we had created this sound
Everything wasn’t lost, a solution we’d found
Along came this busload of soundalike guys
Who wrote songs as we did, like “Shiver” and “Spies”
I’ve tried a different sound but I can’t get it right
bits of "White Shadows" sound like Athlete's "Half Light"
and all these others that are now on the scene
I'm bent and I'm broken and I'm sounding like Keane
I feel the tears running down my face
as I realise we sound just like Embrace
I'll sing it one last time before I go
oh, now we sound like Snow Patrol
[sing out, ooooooooooooooh, yeahhhhhhhhhhhhh, ooooooooooooooooooooooh, yeahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh]
At 10:28 am,
swisslet said…
I almost forgot to mention - Lord B and I stopped off at an out of town retail park after footie yesterday (so he could pick up some stuff for his nipper). As we were about to go our seperate ways, we were just discussing our plan for getting off to see Coldplay in Bolton on Monday (what time are we leaving, and so on....). As we were doing this, we were accosted by a woman who had just come out of Argos and was about to get into her white van.
"When are Coldplay touring?"
"er... next week"
"Where are they playing"
"um, Bolton... and some other places"
"brilliant....any tickets left"
"there might be"
and so on.
I suppose it's one way you can measure the success of a band.... when Argos shoppers are into you, then you've hit the mass markets.
ST
(I'm also currently fuming because James Blunt is playing Rock City in October, and he sold out straight after his Glastonbury appearance... and guess what? They're all on bloody Ebay at twice face price already. Bastards.)
At 11:47 am,
Damo said…
Who is this James Blunt guy? I don't know a thing about him and all of a sudden he has all these big sold out shows (including one in Bristol)...
At 12:23 pm,
John McClure said…
We Thought We Knew (ew)
I typed it on a keyboard
At work because I was bored
Of sucking up to the board
A hole into my head bored
My hopes and dreams snapped in two
Left standing in my tu-tu
My love has wandered off too
Revoked my right to use "tu"
We all thought we knew ew ew
That everything was new ew ew
We knew, but did we know oh oh?
I don't think so, no.
oh oh
I promised not to sing 'pain'
Or ever rhyme it with 'pane'
But my intentions weren't plain
Up there aboard that fast plane
We all thought we knew ew ew
That everything was new ew ew
We knew, but did we know oh oh?
I don't think so, no.
oh oh
[instrumental + crazy frog joke]
Across the world I flew ew
Smoke up a chimney flue ew
We knew, but did we know oh?
I don't think so
no no no
oh oh oh
At 1:37 pm,
Damo said…
>[instrumental + crazy frog joke]
Genius.
At 4:46 pm,
red one said…
You should've asked in June
I would have given you the moon
Sing out oh yeah yeah etc
Sing out oh yeah yeah etc
There's always one more cliche
to unleash, eh?
Sing out oh yeah yeah etc
Sing out oh yeah yeah etc
OK, I'm bored now.
RedOne
At 10:37 pm,
Damo said…
Smash the state
Storm the barriers
Your chains are imaginary
Turn your mother in
She is against the cause
Join us comrades
...
I'm not sure if I'm getting this quite right.
At 6:52 pm,
Anonymous said…
As a new fan of Coldplay, I don't know how well this will turn out. Lots of ohhhing, ahhing and abstract statements, I think...
'If Only'
The sun has set on another day,
I want to go back to the beginning,
Everything’s gonna be okay,
Everything’s gonna be alright,
If I could only go back to the beginning.
(Chorus)
If only I could tell you what you were to me
If only I could change what I did ohhhhhh
If only I could tell you what you did for me
If only I could go back. ohhhhhh
Before the sun rises
Before it all begins again
I want to tell you what you were,
I want to tell you what you did
Chorus
It will be okay,
I’ll stop guessing,
I’ll stop remembering,
If only I had told you
If only I hadn’t lost you
If only I had told you
Chorus followed by drum/guitar instrumental
I never found you ooooouuuuuuu
I never found you, oooooouuuuuuu
I never told you, ohhhhhouuuuu
I never told you. ohhhhhouuuuuuuu
At 9:34 pm,
Anonymous said…
I've just become a fa-a-an
of Cold Play and "yer ma-a-an"
who calls himself "Swiss Toe-o-nee"
but really is a pho-o-nee.
I thought you were so ug-lee ee
until I met you ree-cently.
The wig and tash are fake you see
and without them --he's love-el-ee
The wine is kicking in!!
Your wet suit on your blaw-aw-og
will look great in the cat-a-logue.
I must go now and walk the dog
and try to sober up!!
I'll walk down by the sea-ee-ee
and make a cup of tee-ee-ee
good-bye from John's mum-ee-ee
and so-on and on-and -on!!
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