52% intelligent. 9% modest. More monkey than bear.

Tuesday, July 26, 2005

And you don't taste like her and you never ever will

I don't have it very often, but sometimes....just sometimes..... nothing hits the spot quite like fish and chips. It's my last night before C. comes back from France, so I have decided to nip out to the chippie at the end of the road and have the works: Haddock. Chips. Curry sauce.

I'm quite particular about this.

I always have them wrapped up without having any salt or vinegar added whilst I am in the chippie (makes them soggy). Then when I get home, I have to completely remove all of the wrapping and decant my tea onto a plate. This process usually sends some chips flying about the kitchen, but I can't stand having all that greasy paper flapping about the place. I will then carefully lift the fish up and stick some sea salt and malt vinegar directly onto the chips. I then lower the fish and liberally sprinkle its top side. Not too much salt mind, but plenty of vinegar - usually enough for it to be washing around the bottom of my plate and for a gloriously acidic scent to waft off the steaming chips. Then, in a daring manoeuvre that leaves the purists gasping, I will pour my curry sauce all over the top. Proper lumpy chip shop curry sauce, mind, not the smooth chinese stuff.

Then I grab a fork and a nice big mug of builder's tea (just the way I like it - strong with just a dash of milk), and all that remains is to sit down and enjoy Britain's great contribution to world cuisine.

mmmmm.

How do you eat yours?

posted by swisslet @ 18:55  

24 Comments:

  • At 7:18 pm, Blogger Radmila said…

    That sounds really, really good.
    We haven't got Curry Sauce here with our Fish and Chips.
    Just wine or white vinegar, salt and/or Ketchup/or tartar.
    :(
    Do you have a recipe for this Curry Sauce?

     

  • At 7:28 pm, Blogger red one said…

    Still in the chipie, ask the bloke to hang on a tick when the chips are in the paper. Add small amount of salt and loads of vinegar. Then fish goes down and it's all wrapped up. Gives time for vinegar to soak in on the way home.

    Open up packet and put the whole lot down on a plate, still on its paper. I find the plate-and-paper combo offers maximum lap protection. Eat with fingers.

    Mug of tea the way I like it: weak and black.

    *mouth waters*

    No salt or vinegar on the fish, by the way, because the chippie round here is very good and the batter actually does taste nice on its own. I'll still tuck in quite happily if someone else has put it on though.

    RedOne

     

  • At 8:03 pm, Blogger Flash said…

    Not with bloody curry sauce, that's for sure!

     

  • At 8:20 pm, Blogger John McClure said…

    I know they're endangered, but I want cod, not haddock.

    I want the vinegar on first so the salt has something to stick to and doesn't clatter to the bottom of the paper.

    I'm with redone on the paper and plate thing. I like a liberal dollop of (Heinz) ketchup on the side.

    To drink, I like a nice cold glass of lemonade - none of that freshly squeezed lemon muck neither, it's R Whites or forget it - to cut through the grease that coats the roof of one's mouth.

    If you put curry sauce or mushy bloody peas anywhere near my fish supper, I'd knock you out.

     

  • At 8:29 pm, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    fish in batter, not bothered about choice of fish.

    Large chips (come on, I am six foot six tall...)

    Salt and vinegar added by chip shop worker (liberally).

    Small carton of mushy peas.

    Small carton of curry sauce (not every time, admittedly). Curry sauce to be poured on chips only, not on fish.

    Slice white bread and butter.

    Mug of tea, weak with lots of milk.

    bliss.

    I tried to explain (in French) to a Frenchman once that we served fish and chips wrapped in copies of previous days newspapers. This ended up in him thinking my French was rubbish as he was convinced that I didn't know the meaning of the word "journal"....

     

  • At 8:32 pm, Blogger HistoryGeek said…

    So first off, just have to say that it's a testament to you Brits' love of fish & chips that these descriptions are bordering on pornographic.

    We have to go to a pub to get fish & chips, usually. Then it's served on a plate. Lot's of malt vinegar (if they know their stuff and have it stocked) and a little salt on the fish. Ketchup on the chips. Usually goes down well with a pint of something dark.

     

  • At 8:38 pm, Blogger Mark said…

    soy sauce on chips. the sauce melts into the potato and gives the potatoes a nice, slightly spicy flavour. beautiful.

     

  • At 9:21 pm, Blogger Erika said…

    I gotta' hand it to you Brits, you may be teased about your cooking but there is nothing, NOTHING, that compares with a good fish and chips or a takeaway madras curry with two naan breads. Or a Yorkshire pudding, but that could be just my particular fetish.

    Here we eat our fish and chips with tartar sauce. Oh, the humanity.

     

  • At 10:27 pm, Blogger Charlie said…

    I've never had the chance to try this, but it sounds rather enticing.

     

  • At 10:32 pm, Blogger Herge Smith said…

    Interesting/ controversial move with the curry sauce...

    I'm also a paper to plate man - but then I can't pee at a urinal so...

    I'm not even sure if there is a connection there, but you shared, so I thought I had better as well.

     

  • At 10:44 pm, Blogger adem said…

    I usually don't have fish and chips but there's one down the seafront that does these little bags of Saithe and Chips for £1.20

    The portions are just enough to fill that craving. The only problem is that when I put the salt on I want to reach the ones at the bottom of the bag so I have to pour loads on so that they get salted. Also I'm a bit of a skinflint so I won't pay the 10p to get the sachet of ketchup!

    Otherwise it's great and I can then get a pint after.

     

  • At 11:51 pm, Blogger John McClure said…

    One thing I forgot to mention - I had fish and chips at Lords the other day during the lunchbreak in the cricket. I'm not a member of the MCC, so I wasn't having it served to me on a balcony by an aproned lackey called Simpkins - more's the pitty - I was buying it from a stall at the nursery end. For the guts of eight quid. You could have made maybe two fish fingers from the amount of fish I got, and the chips? Well, at one point I accidentally ate some of the box it had all come in and didn't notice the difference.

    All right, all right, I'm just avoiding the issue. I can't pee at the urinal either.

     

  • At 12:30 am, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    I like to eat mine NAKED!!

     

  • At 1:14 am, Blogger Robin said…

    nicely crisp chips slapped heavy-handedly into paper, biggest piece of haddock int he shop dropped lovingly from a height onto chips. Say "Yes" when asked "saltnvingr mate?". Hope they don't just tease it with the salt for bloody once.

    Get home, slap the contents of the grease soaked big brown paper bag or sweaty millimetre thin plastic bag on kiddies little red table that doubles as coffee table when they're in bed. Remove annoying first layer of paper from everything, fold second layer under meal, eat.

    The best fish comes from the on-site chippy at Primrose Valley Holiday Park, Yorkshire. Shame the chips are unmitigated shite, but you can't win them all.

    Next best fish is the salmon steak I cook to go with singapore noodles. Top grub.

     

  • At 1:19 am, Blogger Robin said…

    Oh and a recipe for the curry sauce: take a handful of strange, gelatinous but completely unidentifiable lumps of something, add curry paste until the consistency of wallpaper paste, or school glue. Heat to melting point of styrofoam.

    Pour over chips. Consume with fingers, ignoring blisters.

    This recipe should be prepared four days in advance and for best taste, served after 2am and many beers.

     

  • At 8:07 am, Blogger Aravis said…

    Should I ever get to England, I want to try eating fish and chips the proper way, served in rolled up paper. You can't find it that way here. It's served in restaurants, on plates. Most people prefer tartar for their fish and ketchup for their chips. My mother raised me to eat them with salt and vinegar. She shares your nationality. *G* Even when I eat fries without fish, I sometimes opt for vinegar over ketchup.

    And I'm afraid I'm not fond of curry, but I'll pass along the idea to my mother, who is. :0)

     

  • At 8:20 am, Blogger Statue John said…

    I prefer mine without the fish. A nice mushroom pie usually does the trick...

    Oh, and way to go Anonymous. We have a winner ;)

     

  • At 8:50 am, Blogger The Num Num said…

    Mushy Peas, vinegar soaked Chilli Chips (made the proper way in Southall), and a few Samosas too, washed down with Masala Chai.

    - numnum, doing it with a bit of eastern flava

     

  • At 9:04 am, Blogger Teresa Bowman said…

    I like to eat my fish and chips sitting on Brighton beach watching the sun set.

    OK, so I've only ever done that once, but it was good enough for me to decide that it's the only way to eat fish and chips.

    A couple of pickled onions wouldn't go amiss either.

     

  • At 11:19 am, Blogger Teresa Bowman said…

    My uncle and aunt in Yorkshire used to get their fish and chips from the local Chinese takeaway. The woman that worked there was known in the neighbourhood as "Effin' Else", because when you'd ordered she'd say, "You wa' effin' else?"

    She also used to ask, when she'd dumped your portion of chips and piece of fish on the paper, "You wa' sore finger?" It took them a while to work out that she wasn't threatening them, but merely asking if they wanted salt and vinegar.

     

  • At 10:32 pm, Blogger Ali said…

    Muahy Peas.

    Pineapple Fritter.

    The building blocks of romance.

     

  • At 11:41 pm, Blogger Damo said…

    I like to eat mine with the fish taken back, put behind the counter and replaced with a spring roll.

    Well actually, I don't mind fish every now and then.

     

  • At 8:38 am, Blogger Tom said…

    I hardly ever have fish and chips from the chip shop anymore. Lately it seems to smell better than it actually tastes. I don't know why.

    Doing it yourself, though, Ross Fish (haddock or cod), McCain's oven chips, lots of salt and vinegar with pickled eggs and pickled onions), just lovely.

     

  • At 8:56 am, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    I like crumbed fish, preferably hoki, with lemon on the fish.

    As for chips, I like 'em fat and fresh with lots of salt, then vinegar, then a bit more salt. That way the first lot of salt gets absorbed into the chip with the vinegar, and the second lot sticks to the vinegar.

    Either than, or I go for chicken salt and gravy, but not not when I'm combining it with fish. That would just be too weird.

    - OLS

     

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