52% intelligent. 9% modest. More monkey than bear.

Wednesday, September 28, 2005

understand the world we're living in

I've just caught up on the 45 posts I had missed over at Retro-Boy whilst I was away. Well. I only missed about 35 whilst I was actually away, but when I saw how much I had missed, I was a little intimidated by the amount of posting, and kind of put off catching up until now, and a very dull game of football on the telly.

I don't know what I was worried about. It was good! I learnt that our hero has appeared on the back of an Alabama 3 DVD, that he has been offered Voluntary Redundancy, that he's signed an autograph as Moby, seen pictures of him with a shaven head, that I'm a socialist, that Louise Wener would be one of his celebrity exceptions, that there has been a devastating plague in Warcraft... and much, much more.

I also learnt that I have been tagged (once I'd worked out that I was the "Gentle Giant").

Here we go then:

7 things I plan to do before I die
1) See a whole lot more of the world than I already have
2) Find a job that is both fulfilling *and* worthwhile
3) End all war and bring social justice to all
4) Spend a lot of quality time cuddling my lovely girlfriend
5) Become carbon neutral (should eat fewer beans, right?)
6) Become a published author
7) Become a grumpy old man (ideally not one that smells of piss)

7 things I can do
1) argue the toss about anything, with anyone
2) raise either eyebrow independently of the other
3) cook a mean chili-con-carne
4) Get a grump on with the best of them
5) juggle
6) stay in bed for hours and hours and hours
7) watch a game of cricket for 5 days straight and not get bored once

7 things I cannot do
1) sit still (especially when I'm in the house on my own)
2) goalkeeping
3) listen to classical music
4) keep my mouth shut
5) leave an open packet of biscuits in the house
6) stop my face from showing what I'm thinking - good or bad
7) tolerate Simply Red

7 things that attract me to the opposite sex
1) brains
2) wit
3) a sexy nose
4) a twinkle in the eye
5) the way she moves
6) standing up to me
7) having strong opinions

7 things I say most often
1) "wanker"
2) "bollocks"
3) "fuck" (in all of its infinite variety)
4) "piss off"
5) "nice"
6) "we are where we are" (at work, all the bloody time)
7) "that would be an ecumenical matter"

(you lot are probably as good a judge of this as anyone - you tell me)

7 celebrity crushes
1) Julie Christie
2) Catherine Keener
3) Zoe Telford (from Teachers and Absolute Power)
4) Jane Fonda (c. Barbarella)
5) Isabel Adjani (especially c. La Reine Margot)
6) Disco Kylie (not pop moppet Kylie)
7) Angelina Jolie (I'm only human)

(I have always found this kind of list really hard, and have always really struggled to list crushes. But there you are.)

I'm meant to tag 7 other people, but I won't be responsible for inflicting this on anyone else, I don't think.

If you want to have a go though, please be my guest.


  • At 1:49 am, Blogger Jenni said…

    Noooo, ST!!! Not you and Angelina, too!! I just do not see the appeal. *sigh*

  • At 5:20 am, Blogger Erika said…

    What makes a nose sexy, pray tell? And are you a nose fetishist then? Are you prone to nose nibbling?

  • At 5:42 am, Blogger Aravis said…

    I have no use for Jolie, though I can see why men find her attractive. She seems to me to be all sex and no substance in terms of her relationships with the men in her life. Her devotion to children earns a grudging nod from me, though.

    These were interesting lists, ST. Thanks!

  • At 7:57 am, Blogger Mark said…

    ah hello = it wasn't really 35 posts was it?

  • At 8:13 am, Blogger swisslet said…

    "all sex and no substance"?

    and you wonder what the appeal is?

    Actually, C. agrees with me on Angelina (or at least she sees the appeal) -- she is an amazingly sexy woman, but she also clearly has both a brain and a conscience.

    She also looks a bit dirty. Know what I mean? Bit intimidating though, I reckon.

    (for the record, C's list would include people like Anthony Edwards, Thierry Henry & George Clooney)

    The nose?? I'm not prone to nibbling, as it happens. What makes a nose sexy? It's probably a lot to do with the person wearing it.


  • At 1:54 pm, Blogger Jenni said…

    I've always thought her lips looked too big for her face. Guess that puts me squarely in the minority. :)

  • At 6:19 pm, Blogger the urban fox said…

    I can do the eyebrow thing too. Does that make us TWINS!??!?!?!?!!11111111

    Yeah, I guessed you could probably get an almighty cob on for hours.

    ** Americans: calm down, it doesn't mean what you think it does **

    Everyone fancies Telford at the moment, don't they? When I say 'everyone', I mean straight men mainly, although I know one woman who is in a state of near stalkageddon over her. Bless.

    As for Jolie, well. The woman is outlandishly fit, one cannot argue with that. Barking, but fit. Although I loved it when Aravis said "I have no use for Jolie", like Elizabeth I dismissing a lady-in-waiting. Aces.

    How can you watch over 25 minutes of cricket without flatlining and yet be unable to tolerate classical music? This is all wrong.

  • At 6:39 pm, Blogger Aravis said…

    ST, I said I could see why men like her, just that I didn't. *G* And I didn't say she wasn't intelligent. I said she holds no substance for the men with whom she has been involved, meaning she seems a bit of a will o' the wisp to hold onto.

    Thank-you fox. You're welcome in The Royal Presence any time! ;0)

  • At 6:51 pm, Blogger the urban fox said…


  • At 7:20 pm, Blogger -L said…

    ST, what do you want to publish?

    And I must say, I do see the Angelina appeal! However, I don't see Brad's appeal AT ALL (which I know wasn't part of the conversation but felt the need to add). Blech!

  • At 8:13 pm, Blogger red one said…

    Eyebrows - me too.

    Maybe we are all the same person.

    Everyone fancies Telford at the moment, don't they?

    Not if they've been there, they don't. Although it's more interesting than Milton Keynes, admittedly.


  • At 8:22 pm, Blogger HistoryGeek said…

    Angelina...yes, Angelina.

    Brad...as Hercules, yes...as just Brad, no. I've always been a sucker for a man in a skirt with a sword!

  • At 8:36 pm, Blogger swisslet said…

    Spin - sorry, but I can't let it slide.... Achilles.... I have a problem. We all knew what you meant, but I wouldn't have slept if I didn't correct you.


  • At 8:43 pm, Blogger swisslet said…

    Oh, and I want to publish a book, I think. Technically I am published, in the sense that the odd bit of journalism got published in local papers in my youth (literally about 5 "pieces", one of which drew a letter of complaint, which I am very pleased about).

    I'd love to write for a living, I think.

    I should also point out that doing lists of "people I fancy" is something I have always had a really hard time doing. Although I'm a pretty critical person generally, I don't often apply that to the way people look, and I can always see features in people that make them special. Making a list like this one was actually really hard, and to be honest I wouldn't say that I actually desired any of those women in anything other than a really abstract way. As you can see from the list of things I find attractive in a woman, a lot of them are cerebral rather than physical. I nearly didn't pick anyone, or was going to put something like "Mrs Crabapple from the simpsons", but in the end I kind of forced myself into it. I don't think I have "a type" though. I'm sure Lord B will tell you that the reason I struggle with this sort of list is that I worry about what people will think it says about me. Maybe that's partly true too.


  • At 8:44 pm, Blogger swisslet said…

    maybe I should find and reprint here some of those articles.....

    *wanders off thoughfully*

  • At 10:20 pm, Blogger LB said…

    From memory, you're defining criterion for "women you fancy" was that "they'd be dirty".

    hence Disco Kylie rather than car-mechanic Kylie. And Angelina Jolie, presumably.

    so where's Charlotte Church on your list? eh? eh?

  • At 10:30 pm, Blogger swisslet said…

    "They'd be dirty"?

    That's a good defining criteria, but I'm not sure it's what I said.... it's certainly why disco Kylie and not car mechanic Kylie, but where does that leave Julie Christie, eh? Tell me that?


  • At 3:17 am, Blogger -L said…

    Do bring out your work! Don't be shy!

  • At 10:20 am, Blogger John McClure said…

    Surely a mechanic would be dirtier than a disco dancer.

    Oh wait - you mean a different kind of dirty, don't you?


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